Aging and Disease

We know the answer to that unasked question is “No.” The question is not asked, because asking the question would force us to talk about it. It is the two thousand pound elephant in the middle of the room that we walk around and pretend not to see. Something is changing. The angry outbursts and memory problems and mood swings could be caused by a number of things…but it could be Alzheimer’s disease. Far too often we would rather walk around the elephant than acknowledge it.

If Alzheimer’s has no cure why do we need to know if that is the reason for the changes?

Because other things can bring about similar symptoms and a lot of THOSE things can be treated. Ruling out other organic problems will help the family look that elephant right in the eyes and figure out how to work with it. A Neurologist can run a few tests, ask some questions and give you a pretty good idea whether it is Alzheimer’s disease and if it is what stage they are in.

What if it is Alzheimer’s disease?

If it is then you begin to deal with the reality rather than pretend not to notice. Thankfully the days of locking the “crazy aunt” in the attic are gone. Someone with dementia may be behaving in a way that is totally out of character but if you equip yourself with knowledge about the disease and put together a plan you will be far better prepared than if you try to correct, remind, cajole or demand that your loved one stop behaving oddly. If you had a brain tumor could it be removed by demanding it vanish? Could denying that it existed make it go away? Alzheimer’s disease is organic. It isn’t a will full act of misbehavior or forgetfulness. Plaque is spreading across the brain and taking with the ability to make good judgments, keep themselves in check (loss of inhibitions), short term memory and eventually gait problems, speaking or even swallowing will be compromised.

There are new medications which offer some promise but the most important thing for you to do is accept the disease for what it is and learn all you can to keep them safe.

What if I can’t stand the elephant?

You can. Your loved one is still the same person. They are losing themselves but they are in there, trapped in a body that is betraying them. You will need help. You can’t do it all alone but you can look for resources in your community, call the Alzheimer’s Association,
Ask your family to take on specific tasks. Wandering may become a problem. Don’t assume anything. Your loved one can get lost in their own house. Everything is a strange new world for them. Your number one priority is keep them safe and help them feel secure.

I am ask so often by those who fear their loved one has Alzheimer’s “What should I do for them?” Unfortunatly many of those who ask decide to let the elephant sit in the room and roar. They close their eyes and close their ears and hope that everything will go back to the way it once was. Those Alzheimer’s patients are in danger of wandering away from home and becoming hopelessly lost, driving a car without the ability to operate it safely and they are on their own.

If you have a gut feeling that someone you care about is showing symptoms please check it out. They can’t ask you for help. They can’t help themselves. Don’t you owe it to them to learn all you can and keep them safe?

Into the Mist, When Someone You Love Has Alzheimer’s Disease

Tags: Illness, Medical